Anstarren

Alright I’ll be the first to say it, people like to stare here in Berlin. Whether it be on the train, walking past a bar, or right now in the meininger lobby at breakfast I have noticed that Germans are not afraid to stare. I’ve heard many stories of the never ending stares that Jessie and/or Izzy have received. And have felt the death stares while enjoying a loud conversation on the train. And yes, while it may sometimes it might make me fear for my safety, I choose to see the best in it! During Remote Mitte one of the directions was to look into the eyes of a stranger on the train. The recording mentioned that it might be hard for the stranger, that they probably would be too uncomfortable to look us in the eye. And while I would expect this to be true from what I’ve experienced on the trains in NYC, I found the opposite effect, the man I decided to stare at had no problem making eye contact with me, yet once we were both aware of each other I immediately looked away. An unconscious reaction that I could not control. It was so weird, I had no problem dancing like a lunatic or walking backwards if the recording told me to, yet a task as simple as looking someone in the eye I didn’t have the balls to do. That’s why I admire every person here who stares. Yes, it may be a “social rule” that strangers do not look at other strangers, but why not?! If you’re curious about something, or you just simply want to, you should be able to look at someone. Not in any sexual or objectifying kind of way, just with a natural human curiosity. Going to the theatre is quite literally paying to stare at someone in the dark for a few hours, something that if we did in everyday life, we would be deemed crazy. But there is so much value in observation of another human being. Or even less than that, simply really looking at someone. I find that nowadays when we talk to people, no one really looks at one another. Eye contact makes people uncomfortable, which is such a sad and scary thing to say. Are we really going to create a generation who doesn’t have the balls to look each other in the eyes when they speak? Do we really have to be that disconnected from one another? So yes, although we are uncomfortable with all the stares we might receive here in Germany, I would like to look for the good side in this. We are here in a culture where people are not yet afraid to come into contact with another human being, and I think that is quite valuable.