Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Oedipus. The Experience. (A Satire)

“Critics rave, so good- you’ll be clawing at the doors.” ~ Washington Post

“It’s a trend setter, everyone that walked out of there were talking how they wanted to jab their own eyes out too.” ~ German Weekly

“I liked it.” ~ Charles Manson

“I heard ‘Erotic Crisis’ over at Gorki was alright.” ~ Berliner Ensemble

            The only way anyone could appreciate something truly great, is to first experience the bad. Oedipus, the spectacle witnessed at Deutsches Theatre the night of June 1st was questionable to begin with. Having been familiar with the intensity of crowded lines waiting to get tickets and shows selling out rapidly, but that night there was a different outcome. The audience trickled in slowly and filled in sparse portions of seats.
            Children’s voices filled the theatre with opening lines of the play and with the lift of a curtain, what looked like a huge wooden skateboard ramp was lit, beginning one of the most prolonged 50 minutes of my life.
                        The costumes, as they were the first impression, were… A choice.  Pleated pioneer skirts, color matching dress shoes and form fitting tank tops they borrowed from the Jersey Shore- the designer’s choice was, “Strong, but wrong.” in the words of Lighting Designer, Jason Flamos.
            One thing I knew to accept was the lengthy portions of dialogue, and didn’t try to become too involved with their tones, qualities, and dramatic pausing, but every human has to break at some point. As said human, I couldn’t bear to look at each actor when they decided to stare into the audience with almost constipated facial expressions, seeming as if it were an attempt at Noh Theatre. Some were able to maintain a foundation of respect in my mind because they didn’t speak.
            Oedipus, Jocosta, and Teiresias, were three that captivated the audience with guttural shrieking, the gouging out of eyes was a particularly favorite moment due to the cute amount of blood spilled and risible eye popping, had audiences coughing to cover their laughs as Oedipus stared out into the audience for a total of 2 ½ minutes, (since it took so long for Creon to soak up all the blood).
            As the plot “intensifies” Jocosta can be found Stage Left punching her own stomach and chanting to what is believed to be Kanye’s new album.
            Teiresias has proven to prove as the most useless blind fortuneteller in all of Thebes, since he is too preoccupied trying to whack people with his walking stick.
            Sadly Antigone and Ismene were pledging over for Alpha Delta Phi and missed the first act, but they made it back just in time to root for their brother as he tried out for the Marching Band and Flag twirlers… at the same time.
            They’re hoping he’ll make the Chess Team next year.
There were moments that I would sit and think, “Now wait. Do I like this yet? What am I even looking at? I am enjoying it?” But as the first 45 minutes drew, and made my escape, on it was pretty easy to come to my conclusion.

            That was awful.



                                   So good, you'll wish didn't have eyes to begin with.


** No his eyes are naturally that wide.

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